A 2015 study released by the American Psychological Association found strong link between children who go up the slide and future homicidal tendencies. The parents of over 200 prison inmates were surveyed concerning their incarcerated childrens’ park behavior.
Out of the 200 parents polled, 97% of them reported that they allowed their child to run up the slide. The other parents did not have parks in their neighborhood.
Other behaviors strongly associated with murderous tendencies included:
being aggressive on the play structure
intentionally kicking parent while on the swings
removal of shoes in the sandbox area
definitely not any kind of abuse or trauma
sure I like to take a drink every now and again
I'm a good mom, okay?
I already got me a man
you gonna have to talk to Craig about that
you definitely gonna have to talk to Craig about that